today

gosh, i really dun know whr to start tidying up the house. dila is coming soon and the guest room is not even close to be ready at all. haniff is getting stressed out all the time. work loads, house not finish decorated. he started something but didn't finish hehehe tht is sooo him. the kitchen,bathroom, hall and now the guest room. i am always not well. headache and always feeling i am doing everything so fast. i need to slow down. calm myself b4 i collapse. so many times the girls saw me fell. the doctor cldn't find anything wrong with me but there must be something. maybe disagree with my body system. here, ppl know all sort of medical terms. have to try to learn as well. malasnya sbb sumer nama scientific sgt. nama melayu kan senang. sakit urat, terpeleot,tergelecoh hehehe

g anto iman tadi, ada la kawan tanya baru potong rambut iman. kita pun jwb la ye, naper? dia suka rupanya. dia ckp ngan laki dia anak dia pun suka rambut gitu so.... i am watching this space! tak tahu la tak suka kalu ada org nk copy2 nih. sbb hari2 sekolah dia akan tanya esok iman pakai baju apa, stoking ker tights hehehe bless her. she is nice but kekadang tu rimas :-p
ada kawan sorang tuh copy something jugak, in the end bila kita tanya, nk marah, boleh?

every morning i make sure i call mummy. tanya khabar dia. daddy normally call kat tghari skit sbb time tu tak bz. pagi2 susah skit sbb kalu sembang ngan pak aji punya la byk gossip dia. i get it, he miss me hehehe ngan org lain duk berlaga angin. actually ngan kita pun tgk hari dia mood ok, hah, panjang la celoteh dia. gossip politik la, makan la etc. i miss him dearly. with mummy kalu gaduh normally bengang je tapi daddy, jadi sebak. i think becoz i am quite close to him.

smlm sembang ngan SIL. sian dia nak motivated skit. susah bile duk umah mertua, tak de kawan, nk kuar kena kaut sumer anak2... been there, felt it and it is hard but at least mummy tak duk umah sgt plus dun really interfere. my MIL eventhough nowadays i can see the goodness, still the badness left some scars tht r sooo hard to forgive and forget but i love haniff, so telan je la. kita nih tua nanti tak tahu lagu mana. maybe lebih cerewet dari parent kita org mertua kita. pandai2 la pk sendiri. pastu satu lagi kita je yg boleh pujuk diri kita, tak de org lain dah. kalu nk nangis tuh nangis la tapi after tht, istifar byk2 then calm urself down.
whn i was younger, whn i have problem, wht i did was, i went to every masjid in usj (tht time duk kat usj), then selayang bila pindah umah. i was so stressed with work, love life, family, money etc. in every women's life, they will fall for a bad boy. i did, mine was three hehehe. the last one was really nightmare. malay, kelantanese and so damn proud to be drinking infront of me. wht was tht all abt? jiwa rasa tenang dgn suara azan, ayat2 al-quran... tapi sifat manusia. bila kita perlukan pertolongan DIA, kita mencari. memohon, bertanya. kenapa ujian itu jatuh pada kita. tapi bila kita ok, nak spare 5 min atas sejadah pun susah.

why i put the title "TODAY"? its becoz i have thinking all the things tht i have done, not proud and haunting me for the rest of my life. things tht i hope none of my children will do or think at of doing it.

p/s watched ironman just now, soooo totally crazy for robert downey still hehehe

New Sofa cover

Went to Brent Cross IKEA recently and bought a new sofa cover. yg lama akan digunakan utk buat cover kerusi meja makan since iman and alisya selalu buat sepah hheheeh cantik tak? bantal tu haniff yg pilih sbb dia sukeeee bunge2 sekarang. worry? er... sikit2 sbb tak pernah2 suka bunga now suka ... ngeriiiiiii

Sinus

Lama dah tak update. syida dah bising.. malas sbb tak reti nk update ape. lagi pun rumah semak giler, adilah nk dtg in march tapi rumah berterabur. malu. bkn taknak kemas tapi asyik sakit kepala manjang. sinusitus is getting really bad. sampai tak leh buat apa2. pening loya (no, i am not pregnant though i wish hehehe) dengan budak2 pun takleh nak main sangat sbb disturbing my actions with them.
last night p IKEA Brent Cross, bought new cover for my sofa after 6 yrs heheh dah koyak rabak heheh budak2 lasak sgt. kaler biru jugak, denim but darker and stream red color. Haniff berkenan ngan one cushion so bought tht one as well. it looks really nice actually. will have to remember to take pictures so mummy daddy can see. oh, Gha is in surabaya. good for her. envy all her jobs. hari tuh g france,italy etc. now travelling asia. bless her. rezeki tapi tak best kena tinggal kan anak2 yg kecik. eventhough mummy daddy and anjang acik jaga, it still not the same with u taking care of ur own.

K.long is singing again. can't say i blame her but she shld try to find other options as age is growing older. it just not suitable for her anymore.

Jai and Rozi, hopefully r ok and r working their ass to make it work. i really love rozi. so far, ahamdulillah i have two gorgeous and the nice sisters in law anyone can ask. i love k.lina as well. they r both very motherly and very good with people. my parent r so lucky to have them in the family.

Anjang, hopefully she will know wht a germ her love one is. won't be easy but he understands he more than anyone. so all the best to them as well. hopefully we can go back for the wedding.

Acik, just got back from sabah. senyap tupah. takpe la, as long as dia belajo. she is a good sister.

Neeah? in a world of her own heheh bless her, still looking for her indentity. i really hope she learned her lesson so she could move forward and take things more seriously.

Bella, Hareez, Haikal, Hana, MiaB and MiaK (i haven't met yet,looking forward to!) i missed them so much. no very much of an auntie since duduk jauh but try to whn i am back home. iman and alisya loves them to bits.

Haniff, just got back from outstation and they missed their dad sooooo much. i hope i did a good job raising them. respect, not scared.

i am seriously thinking of applying for work. but can i keep up with the new generation? everytime keje always end up with masam muka between collegue? i still need to figure out why am i such a threat to them. i miss malaysia. the ppl, the food, the weather, environment, families and friends. things here r not tht bad. i am more malay still. always have and always be :-)

Wilton Cake Class

Daripada tak buat apa2 kat umah, so aku ikut nasihat one of my respectful friend. She did the course b4 and whn i read her blog, i felt i shld do something abt my routine as well. I like to bake but decorating is not my favorite so to get a bit of the skill would be an advantage! So here r some bits of it and it is my passion,my desire to make everyone in my family happy with my BAKING hehehe so this is my first decorated cake and i must say, i am quite please with it. so look out for the second one, the muffin clown cake heheheh to be continued

frustration

hari ni pening kepala. masalah keluarga tak habis2. dah tuh hubungan kekeluargaan sah2 hilang sbb mende2 gini. one thing i still dun understand is WHY? WHY must one of ur family members feel envy towards u? they got everything they ever wanted and just refuse to realize or see tht.... camne org yg ada anak2 berbelas boleh didik anak2 menreka dgn baik and anak2 mereak dgr ckp mereka. cannot entirely blame the parent, tht i disagree. they did their best so its up the children to follow their heart or mind....

kekuatan keimanan adalah asas kehidupan....

Sejuk

Rasenya biler la boleh panas duk negeri nih. hari nih bwk la budak2 g ukur kaki kat Marlow. pastu g playground skali sbb dah janji ngan iman & alisya. mak oiiiii, sejuk nk mampus! rerupanya suhu -1 degree... giler!!!! ada baiknya aku g duduk di kutub utara terus, ke nganer? so balik umah, masak kurma ayam, sambal belacan, ikan kering daddy/mummy pos dari malaysia, sayur campur and ikan siakap goreng DONE!... tak panas2 jugak badan heheheh kabo ke mummy merapu dia marah kata jgn lupa minum air halia sokmo hehehe nk g shopping pun tak sanggup. haniff baru ambik iman keluar pergi beli brg2 nk buat sup. dia skrg dah pandai masak so bior la dia. alisya tidur. nk gosok baju tak tergamak nk kuar dari duvt so, malam nih je la kut. tata titi tutu

Morning Before Xmas

Right, pagi nih kena bersiap bwk iman pergi hospital for her blood test. she was covered with loads of rashes this couple of wks and need to find out why. it could not be the eggs as Doctor Orton, her allergy specialist said anything could have trigger it. So this morning instead of preparing for Xmas, i am off to the hospital. My MIL will be waiting for us thre as i cannot handle alisya and iman at the same time. Alisya, bless her, is soooooooo everywhr at the moment. She is such a cheeky monkey. Sweet face and so much like a baby still. Iman has grown up to be a beautiful girl. I should be proud yet scared with the world now. sumer org tak puas hati with everything. everyday baca paper, ada je paedophile (org yg gile seks ngan budak2). kenapa dunia jadi camni? wht happen to adults tht was suppose to protect them?
and then kat malaysia, apa jadi dengan hidup sepakat, membawa berkat? yang asyik dilaungkan oleh Hang Tuah, " Melayu takkan hilang di dunia?", Tunku Abd. Rahman melaungkan "Merdeka","Merdeka"..... Cina semakin besar kepala. Sumer kena sama rata.